Critical Recap: Wildemount Wildlings E3 “Wilde Out!”

Hello! Welcome to Critical Recap! I’m Dani Carr, the Critical Role Lore Keeper. Let’s dive into our recap of Wildemount Wildlings Episode 3: Wilde Out!

KID CREATIONS

Game Master Sam Riegel leads his writer’s room kids through a lightning round of creation. Potions of handsomeness and of baby unicorn are invented, as well as a mirror of self-guilt. Two guards, a palm tree and a coconut are brought to the table, along with Dark World and his shadow dimension and the final boss – Wok Wok the Pan Man, a sentient pan in a griddle lair.

DON’T WORRY

With Jessep and Kai unconscious and failing death saves, Sky panics over not having used her strength instead of trying spells. The two are surrounded by darkness, so Padmund lights his entire card game manuscript on fire to give them enough light to find the healing potions and feed them to Kai and Jessep, saving their lives. The others are impressed by Padmund’s selflessness, but he says that there is no point in making a game about heroism if he isn’t doing it in real life. Besides, the game is more fun to make than to finish.

Jessep casts light on her monocle and Kai produces a hooded lantern, allowing the group to head down the hallway and continue their search for Beau and Yasha. The floor is covered in broken wood and glass, but there are a few intact potions, like another greater healing potion, a potion of rizz, and a potion of baby unicorn. Padmund uses the healing potion to return to full health and they continue down the hall.

They come upon two identical doors – one is labeled DW and the other is labeled WW. Kai suggests that they mean ‘Don’t Worry’ and ‘Wery Worry’. Jessep says she is happy to take a risk on a door, as she is feeling much more confident after her brush with death. Kai feels the exact opposite now. They vote for the slightly humming DW door and Padmund opens it – this is Dark World, a horrifying dimension of eldritch unreality. Padmund closes the door.

WOK WOK THE PAN MAN

After a traumatized Padmund vows to pursue legal action against the camp, they open the WW door – this is a waiting room, where two people who look a bit like a palm tree and a coconut argue about who is next in line to see Wok Wok. Kai claims that they are Wok Wok’s assistant interns and they are here to discuss important business with him. The receptionist says she is his assistant. Padmund, having figured out that all of this is some sort of unstable illusory realm, refuses to be bothered with any of it.

Sky decides to hide everyone under her coat and sneak past the receptionist, who is arguing with the coconut man. They sneak by successfully, but the palm tree man notices and raises the alarm. The receptionist shoots a firebolt at them, but they make it through the door, only a bit singed from the attack.

The kids then find themselves on top of a colossal cooktop, with sentient but defeated breakfast dishes scattered on the floor. Wok Wok the Pan Man stands on the other side of the cooktop, frying Gub Gub. Across the room, a door opens as Beau and Yasha step through. Wok Wok spews cooking puns about their merit badges and the group launches into a fight.

CHAOS IN THE KITCHEN

Jessep uses her recently found mirror of guilt to imbue Wok Wok with guilt and strife. When Wok Wok goes to attack Jessep and Kai, he loses his turn when guilt overtakes him. Yasha strangely finds Wok Wok very familiar to her and as Padmund wrestles with whether to stay and fight, Beau promises they’ll get their merit badges. Padmund doesn’t know if camp is worth this, but it is to Sky. She has never belonged anywhere but here with her friends. Sky also reminds Padmund that he needs to save the artist of Mysterium, with which he agrees.

Sky casts grease, but her spell accidentally causes a fireball to hit Yasha. Padmund attacks Wok Wok with his staff, taking out his anger against his father. Wok Wok doesn’t want to hit a kid thanks to his guilt and summons grease elementals. Beau turns the stove down, which cuts off some of Wok Wok’s abilities, and they learn that Wok Wok, being cast iron, is vulnerable to water. Sky’s own guilt makes her feel angry and she finally uses her Rage to attack Wok Wok.

Kai is surrounded by grease elementals, so Beau, calling him ‘Little Beau’, kills the elementals. Padmund sees how stressed out Jessep is and tells her she’s a great sorcerer, then tosses fragrant tea leaves on her. She remembers the first day of camp, when Sky told her she would do a great job. The relaxing memory removes her stress levels. Kai and Padmund use a rope to trip Wok Wok, who falls in front of the attacking Sky and Jessep. The four kids defeat Wok Wok together by kicking him over and over, to Beau and Yasha’s pride.

CURFEW

Everything begins to disintegrate around them. A purple and blue glow lights up as they hear a voice tell them that it’s curfew. Mishi the Curfew Creature appears and teleports everyone back to camp in the Hubbub Hub. Veth and the campers return, amazed to hear about the OLGAs adventures and bravery. Veth knew they had what it takes to be Wildlings! Beau and Yasha confirm that the kids saved two members of the Mighty Nein.

Yeza realizes that the creatures were his fault. He was experimenting with dunamancy in his lab and one of the potions exploded – the one Yasha inhaled. The magic accessed aspects of her imagination and doodles she’d drawn in her notebook, making those images come to life. Padmund informs Veth that he will be pursuing legal action and Veth says she will write him a letter of recommendation to the Soltryce Academy.

Padmund wants all four of them to be allowed back at the camp for free and to not be in the shame-based OLGA cabin anymore. Kai wants Veth’s hat and Jessep wants more tea. Sky wants to create a Friendship Badge. Veth encourages Sky to be both a wizard and a barbarian and promises to get her private lessons with Caleb. Veth is proud of them for having wilded out at the camp and bestows upon them the rank of Threebelow.

EPILOGUE

Veth pulls Beau and Yasha aside and thanks them for pushing the kids and helping them out. Both Yasha and Beau enjoyed their time with the kids. They think they want to take the plunge into parenthood and want to start by fostering. They offer to foster Kai, but he declines. However, Beau and Yasha are proud of themselves for realizing that they are ready to bring a child into their lives.

Padmund did not pursue legal action and was accepted into the Soltryce Academy. He recreated the complete set of Mysterium: Battle Cards of Wildemount and Veth (to make up for her “loser” comment) introduced him to a toymaker she knows. The game will release under the C-Pop Games banner.

Jessep released a line of ultra-soothing loose leaf teas that assist with her anxiety. She had a flare-up when a business rival attempted a hostile takeover of her brand. He was later found cowering in a forest, a slightly different shade of blue than his natural color.

Sky began private tutoring with Caleb, where she embraced both her brains and her brawn. She returned to the camp as its ‘Multi-Class Mentor’ and her Friendship Badge is now the most coveted badge at Wildemount Wildlings.

Kai declined to comment on his current whereabouts – but he did get Veth’s hat.

That is it for Episode 3 of Wildemount Wildlings!

FINAL THOUGHTS

• So true, Veth. Normal is overrated. Probably not insurance, though.
• I guess there are conventional gas ovens all over Exandria now.
• A massive shout out to Libe Barer, Aleks Le, Eden Riegel, and Brennan Lee Mulligan for playing the four cutest campers Exandria has ever seen!

Catch Episode 1 of Thresher on Thursday, April 24th at 7pm Pacific on beacon.tv, where Beacon members get access to the entire episode, podcast included! The episode will also release on twitch.tv/criticalrole and on youtube.com/criticalrole and a week later on our podcast. Is it Thursday yet?